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Movies for the Week of December 27th, 2013

The Invisible Woman
Beyond Outrage
Paranormal Activity: The Marked Ones
Open Grave

The Invisible Woman


the-invisible-woman-posterJosh Hadley: Damn it Jowski, I thought Oscar Bait season was over? Why does everyone love these period pieces so damn much, every actor, every director always seems to want to play in this period, it’s like earning red wings or something… every guy has to do it at least once, even if it tastes bad at the time. Period pieces are boring, overwrought and most of all reek of sheer pretension… just as this film does.

Alex Jowski: I don’t like Dickens.  Sure he’s one of the most profound authors of history and I thought Oliver Twist was “not bad,” but I find the vast majority of his books to be dull and uninteresting.  While he did accomplish new and interesting uses of the English language, I can’t stand his stories.  I’ve no interest in Charles Dickens the person therefore I have no interest in a fictionalized biopic of Charles Dickens in love.  Though, on the positive side, Ralph Finnes does a great job in the trailer of capturing the character of Dickens.

Mike White: After Verhoeven’s Invisible Man a few years ago (The Hollow Man), I was afraid what The Invisible Woman would be like.  Alas, there’s no secret formulas or literal invisibility in The Invisible Woman. Instead, it’s a period piece about Charles Dickens, uptight British people, and secret love affairs. This movie was made for 50+ women to talk about at Book Club.

Glenn Criddle: It looks well done but I’m not particularly interested in this. Costume drama has never been my thing but if you’re good with that then what the hell, it should keep you entertained.

Charley McMullen:  Well…shit.  We just wrapped an episode of Geek Juice Radio on vanity projects and -holy shit!- this bounty of horse shit presents itself, and you just don’t know what to say.  Directed by RAFE (rhymes with RAPE) Finnes, who pronounces it as such, when you and I both know it’s fucking “RALLLFFF”, who has cast himself as Charles Dickens who, apparently, crushed way more ass than the history books have let on.  Have fun, Ralph!  I’ll be here in reality when you get back!  Also, for a guy who hears “Invisible Woman” and expects Sue Richards, this was a serious disappointment.

mister X: so, u probably expect to see me posting an animated gif of someone sleeping to this one, right? but i gotta say…this looks pretty damn good. i’ve always dug fiennes as an actor and it looks like he has a pretty good handle on directing as well-i’ll probably check this out on dvd (that’s a high recommendation from me)…but i’m sorry, kristin scott thomas will NEVER surpass the fine work she did in THIS movie:

x

 

Beyond Outrage


beyond-outrage-poster-large__spanJosh Hadley: I say this does not look bad except for the fact that I have not seen the prior film so I am a tad lost.

Alex Jowski: Takeshi Kitano, aka Beat Takeshi is a wonderfully talented performer and director.  I’ve been a fan of his work ever since seeing him as the schoolteacher in Battle Royale.  Long ago, in one of the first editions of Trailer Park, I included the film Outrage only because I was looking forward to it as a fan of Takeshi’s work.  I eventually caught the movie on Netflix and enjoyed the hell out of it.  I include Beyond Outrage because I am really looking forward to this movie.  Unfortunately I will have to wait for Netflix again because there is no chance this will be airing at the local multiplex here.

Mike White: Beat Takeshi is back and he’s up to his old tricks. Vengeance and blood shed. Fortunately, this isn’t another lame attempt to cross over to American audiences (like Brother in 2000). This is the real deal. This is hard core Yakuza battles of honor and humanity. I’m there.

Glenn Criddle: Well I’m up for this. It looks exciting enough and though I don’t know the first part I’d sit down for this piece of revenge type action drama. I can see this one getting a remake into English language but it’d be good to see it in its original form.

Charley McMullen:  Okay, this has shown me that Japanese filmmakers are just as able to make a bullshit, macho-posturing, corny-one-liner- packed, stereotypical-mafia-pretend-play as American filmmakers are.  This may look like is has every stupid, unbelievable, attitude-above-substance heap of bullshit you’ve seen in every Scorsese, Tarantino, and/or DePalma film over the last 20 years, but it’s probably smaller and more efficient.  Perhaps our cultures aren’t so different after all.

mister X: kitano is one of those directors i feel like i should be paying more attention to but dammit i be BUSY…this DID intrigue me so i might have to check out part one n’ if i dig it, i’ll check this one out too

Paranormal Activity: The Marked Ones


paranormal_activity_the_marked_ones_ver2_xlg-690x1024Josh Hadley: Fuck you Jowski, fuck you to death with an outdated chainsaw enema.

Alex Jowski: What the fuck it this?  Paranormal Activity meets Blood In, Blood Out?  This looks like total crap. Maybe… MAYBE… there could be redemption if this wasn’t a spin-off of the Paranormal Activity series of films.  If this was just a regular horror film about a teenage boy who is slowly possessed by a demon – there could be potential there.  Instead the film mires itself in the PA mythos and the found footage style so it ends up being garbage.

Mike White: You know that things have gone completely downhill for this franchise when they’ve added a subtitle to it. Judging from the VHS tapes and subjective camera, it looks like this movie is a long-form segment from V/H/S. Maybe they should call in those people from The Conjuring or The Last Exorcism to take care of this guy. In other words, this doesn’t even feel like second generation horror but more like the leftovers of leftovers; this is the cinematic equivalent of the sticky scum on the floors of dollar theaters.

Glenn Criddle: Another one? Well at least this one looks like it’s taking things in a different direction but frankly I’m inclined to be very sceptical about anything with words Paranormal Activity in the title. I’m a little confused as to what it as to do with the franchise, in some ways it’d be best to be distancing itself but for me personally I can’t get past the fatigue of seeing this stuff, it’s not new or even remotely interesting anymore. It’s seems more an excuse to have cheap production values as a narrative device and frankly even from this trailer the latter looks as shaky as the camera. This would be a last resort kind of movie for me I think. There’s been way too much shit in this series for me to want to take a chance on it… I pass.

Charley McMullen:  Everyone responsible for this can eat my ass.  That’s it.

mister X: did anyone else think that felt like a movie that was just ripping off the series and got bought up n’ retitled?

i made it thru the 1st film and 20 mins of the 2nd then gave up-the found footage ‘aesthetic’ requires a skilled director/editor combo…something these films don’t have

i will give them credit for APPEARING to try something different

Open Grave


Open-Grave-2013-Movie-PosterJosh Hadley: BORING…

Alex Jowski: Now THIS is a horror movie – THIS is a billion times better than Paranormal Activity: The Marked Ones.  There is a presentation of an original concept, suspense based on these new ideas used to tell a story that you have not seen before.  Is it good?  Well I hope so.. it looks good to me.  Good or bad I would definitely recommend watching Open Grave over that fucking Paranormal Actvity shit.

Mike White: Despite Elysium, I still enjoy Sharlto Copley and will watch a movie based on him alone. This one seems to be about a bunch of people who wake up, unsure of where they are or what they did to get there. I’m reminded of Identity mixed with Predators. Fortunately, the preview doesn’t tell me too much, making me want to see the film. If only more previews were like this.

Glenn Criddle: The premise is not exactly new but why not, this looks okay. I’m not expecting groundbreaking from this though but given my expectations are fairly low then maybe it’ll entertain and kill 90 mins or so.

Charley McMullen:  Well, simultaneous attacks of zombies AND amnesia may be the weirdest idea I’ve heard in fucking years, but it just might be crazy enough to work.. This might be the original take on the zombie genre that I’ve been begging for at least a few years, or this is a bunch of incomprehensible bullshit.  I’m willing to take that risk.

mister X: i have no idea what that was supposed to be about…and thanks to how that trailer was put together, i’ll probably never venture to find out

Next Week
The Truth about Emanuel
Interior: Leather Bar
One Chance
The Legend of Hercules
Leave your thoughts in the comments below.
About The Author
Matthew Coats
Matthew Coats
Formerly known under the pseudonym of Alex Jowski. Site owner, movie aficionado, and film school grad. Matthew Coats presents reviews, some written, some as vlogs, and some as weekly shows, for a variety of different movies and television shows. After years of struggling to get his own projects off the ground amidst the normal routine of living, Matthew Coats decided to create a site in order to share and promote movie reviews, video games and much much more from talented and original people all across the internet.

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