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Movies for the Week of January 3rd, 2014

The Truth About Emanuel
Interior. Leather Bar
One Chance
The Legend of Hercules

The Truth About Emanuel


emanuel_and_the_truth_about_fishes_posterJosh Hadley: Okay, first off, fuck you for not being the film I thought you were, I wanted a deep, introspective look into the films of Joe D’Amato and I get yet another Single White Female, The Talented Mr. Ripley or that one with Michael Keaton. These kinds of movies are just dull, predictable and frankly irritating to sit through.

Alex JowskiAs much as I would have liked something in the vein of Silva Kristal’s or especially Laura Gemser’s Emanuelle, I knew that wouldn’t be the case (mostly because of the spelling of the name).  While my interest was piqued for a moment with the whole “I killed my mother,” that quickly passed when this turned into some girl who grew up without a mother going all psychotic-thriller crazy.  Those were popular in the days ofSingle White Female and The Hand that Rocks the Cradle – that kind of “crazy bitch slasher” kind of movie.  This one however lost me at one bit of dialogue.  When the girls asks “What do I do if the baby wakes up?’ and the mother explaisn “You pick her up and rock her and talk to her..”  NO.  If you need to explain to someone what to do when a baby cries – you don’t have them babysit your kid.  That’s just asking for trouble and hey, guess what, you’ve got trouble but you kinda brought that on yourself didn’t you Ms. Biel.

Mike White: I really was hoping that this was a reboot of the Emmanuel series. Of all the reboots, remakes, and “new chapters” of films, why haven’t we seen a new Emmanuel?

Instead, this is kind of a “Hand that Rocks the Cradle”-type thriller with a little Single White Female kind of twist — at least that’s how I’m interpreting the two main female leads looking very similar in the preview.

I’ll pass, thanks.

Cecil Trachenberg: Interesting. I was hoping it would be a documentary about Sylvia Kristel but no.

mister X:

batman

 

Interior. Leather Bar


interior1Josh Hadley: James Franco is one of the most annoying people on the planet right now, mainly because he thinks his “career” is more than just dumb luck and this… thing just proves it. It’s a documentary about nothing and yet it will win tons of awards and will push Franco even further into the limelight he is so blissfully unprepared to deal with.

Alex Jowski: You know what, James Franco gets a lot of undeserved shit.  Sure he’s done some acting in sub par big budget flicks like Raimi’sSpiderman franchise or that Wizard of Oz movie from a while back.  And hanging around with Seth Rogen and a bunch of “stoner” comedians does create a certain type of image for the guy.  But James Franco is a guy that KNOWS about movies, he knows about the craft and he has a voice that’s sadly not listened to because people assume ‘He was in Pineapple Express, what the fuck does he know.” Here are some articles on film and reviews of movies by James Franco worth checking out sometime.  He has a very well educated and profound outlook on cinema that I greatly appreciate.  Sure he was “that guy in Rise of the Planet of the Apes,” but he’s also the guy that co-directed and stars in Interior. Leather Bar which looks at the making of Cruising, attempts to recreate missing scenes from the movie and deeply analyzes the portrayal of homosexuality in films.  This I can greatly appreciate and I really want a movie like this.  Thank you, James Franco and Travis Matthews. Thank you.

Mike White: Shameless plug time!  We’re going to be covering Cruising in January on The Projection Booth (read about it here: https://www.facebook.com/events/232552733558741/ ) and I’ve seen Interior. Leather Bar. and have interviewed co-director Travis Mathews.

Despite the way the film was presented initially, this is not a re-creation of the alleged “missing 40 minutes” from Friedkin’s controversial 1980 film. Moreover, it’s a look at male sexuality on film. And, as a side note, it’s also interesting to see how less hairy men are in the early 2000s compared to the 70s/80s.

Cecil Trachenberg: I just heard about this the other day and I’m really looking forward to it. A sort of docudrama about the movie Cruising. Not sure if I’ll see it in theaters but I do want to see it.

mister X:

wtf2

for the LAST time jowski-i’m NOT analyzing your home movies again!

One Chance


Josh Hadley: And we have it… the redefinition of the term pretension.

Alex Jowski: This trailer takes the movie it’s representing WAY too seriously.  So we have this kind of underdog that’s determined to become an opera singer against whatever opposition.  Great for him.  But the soundtrack and the quick sweeping camera in the trailer make it seem WAY more epic than it needs to be.  Colm Meany tells him something about believing in yourself and the music swells.  Why all of this grandeur?  Then it turns out that this is the “incredible true story” of someone that was on Britain’s Got Talent and I goran because is this what our civilization has come to?  We’re making movies about people from reality shows now?  Maybe the fellow whose life this film is based on is interesting, but not with all these big-budget film trappings.  Remember The Brady Bunch Movie where the family had to enter a talent show to save.. something, I can’t recall what it was.  This is just that with opera and a larger budget.

Mike White: “As long as I can remember, I’ve wanted to sing.” Imagine that, a British film about an underachiever who wants to make it in a non-working class profession.  We’ve never seen this before, neither on film (Billy Elliot) or in real life (Susan Boyle). But, yeah, I realize that this is the heart lifting tale of Paul Potts, translated to the screen.  I see this as a DVD rental sometime in my future.

Cecil Trachenberg: I was ready to hate this but then Colm Meaney shows up and dammit I love that guy. Still, this movie looks tedious. Basically, fat guy with no confidence can sing opera and goes all the way on Britain’s Got Talent. He finds himself and his confidence along the way, meets a girl, and makes his family proud. Got it. Not gonna see it.

mister X: that looked moving, heartfelt, competent & uplifting…and i have no desire to see it DESPITE chief o’brien being in it

wish they’d make a movie of THIS:

193531601

The Legend of Hercules


legend-of-hercules-posterJosh Hadley: So, this is every movie ever made all rolled into one with a CGI wrapper and bad acting as the topping? Fuck this, fuck you and fuck anyone that wants to see this shit.

Alex Jowski: Hey, Summit, you may want to go ahead and green light all those Twiligh-related spinoffs you’ve been holding on to because this movie isn’t doing you any favors.  I would immediately assume this was a film from The Asylum because that’s how it looks, quick, cheap and obviously trying to cash in on the hype of the upcoming 300 sequel.  It doesn’t even look like anybody in this movie cared enough to put it together – hell every interior scene is so dark it looks like whomever was supposed to light the set said “Fuck this, I’ve got more important stuff to do,” and walked off.  This looks like a rushed made-for-tv movie.  Heck, I’ll take that tv mini-series of jason and the Argonauts again before I sit through this.

Mike White: Before that unneeded sequel to 300 comes out, let’s sneak “The Legend of Hercules” into theaters, what say?   This looks more like the Showtime show “Spartacus” than the Sam Raimi-produced “Hercules: The Legendary Journey”.  Not a lot of levity.  More like a direct-to-video movie that may be sneaking into theaters.   Even the preview is boring.

Cecil Trachenberg: I thought the Rock was Hercules? Ohhhh, this is Summit’s way of trying to undercut that film. Studios do that all the time…so shameless. Why do all movies have the 300 look anymore? I like Kellan Lutz but he is a horrible actor. However, Arena was a ton of fun in a terrible film. This looks to be ridiculous slow mo CGI abuse with the fantasy wrapping. Call me crazy but it will most likely be a lot of fun. A DVD rent for sure.

mister X:

wtf3

 

But seriously

herc1

 

Next Week
Jack Ryan: Shadow Recruit
Ride Along
Devil’s Due
The Nut Job

 

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About The Author
Matthew Coats
Matthew Coats
Formerly known under the pseudonym of Alex Jowski. Site owner, movie aficionado, and film school grad. Matthew Coats presents reviews, some written, some as vlogs, and some as weekly shows, for a variety of different movies and television shows. After years of struggling to get his own projects off the ground amidst the normal routine of living, Matthew Coats decided to create a site in order to share and promote movie reviews, video games and much much more from talented and original people all across the internet.

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